Fucking gov’t employees
Earlier today, I went to Manila City Hall to do some official business. Since I’m no longer in government service, I’m once again powerless in the middle of ass sucking, power thirsty people (Well some of them). There’s this particular lady in the Office of the of City Prosecutor—and I believe that her one and only job description is to stamp on paper the words “RECEIVED BY”. So anyway, she asked me to sign something.. being too lazy to get my ROTRING sign pen, I asked her nicely if I can borrow her PANDA ballpen. Behold! She doesn’t want me to use her pen! As in.. Do I look like some Pen sucking maniac? a PEN NAPPER perhaps? Neknek nyang leche sya no! I almost wanted to go to the nearest mall and get her a box of the fucking panda pens. They can really be a pain in the ass—well.. she looked like a pain in the ass..
I came from government service too but I never, as in never refused anybody who borrowed my pen. How much does a pen worth? 4.50? 5.50? I am mad not because I was not able to borrow a pen from her. I am mad at her for her ugly attitude. She does not deserve to be in government service. And that’s what makes me angrier—Government service deserves someone like me. She should be fired!
On a much darker note---
Something is pulling me again… and I am afraid. It’s pulling me toward endless tears and heartaches. The last time we communicated, I felt that security. In span of two months after we broke up, I felt it again. It was right there—it was clear—it was profound. I was right when I said that just one kiss will take all the pain away. It did. Yep… it really did. But the pain came back with a vengeance. I expected its return… but not the same depth.. the same intensity.
We still love each other. But the difference lies in the fact that with me, I easily fall prey to the niceties that has been exchanged. I easily get fooled by the words I read. On the other hand, that person—can control the feelings. It could be the reason why we just keep on hurting each other. Sometimes, not even knowing why.
Yet, I long to see that person. Have a nice long chat and finally settle it all.
posted by jaded fool @ 9:23 PM
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