sunday morning
i just spent half of the night waiting for G. sleeping but subconsciously waiting. it's been raining last night-- what if she comes? i want to be awake so i can open the door fast. but she didn't. so here i am, lacking sleep and feeling shitty.
but there were signs. i just chose to ignore them. just like the way she ignored me. so why did i still wait? cause in my stupid head i thought i am worthy of her time. so much for someone so insignificant. i am hurt and it's all my fault i didn't listen to the warnings. why do i have to be so effing stubborn? how could i ever forget not to play with fire? so alright, i'll say this again.. i brought this to myself. this is something i felt and did on my own. i have to own responsibility for it.
i have lost her too many times in the past and if she doesn't want me in her life...i think i can handle it one more time.
in this world where only a few matters, i don't think my presence or absence makes any difference in her life.
time to do what is right. i am letting it slide.
Labels: i am pissed, ikaw kasi, just venting out
posted by jaded fool @ 7:51 AM
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