my lessons
ei world, i need to write about it. i don't want to but i think you ought to know..
G knows very well that my relationship with P will not last... yet, i took the risk. because I know I'll learn something from it... I thought the lesson is about patience and effort. That i need to exert more effort and be more patient with P. I am actually more sensitive to her feelings and need. And I actually stopped asking questions and take things as they are.
But I was wrong. The things I enumerated were not the lessons to be learned.
I got too lonely in the relationship. I felt like it was just me in there. I felt like I would never be good enough for her. But unlike before (where I would just shut my mouth), I was vocal about it. I told P how I felt-- I asked her to just be brutally honest with me. I don't care how painful it gets.. All I want is the truth. And that's what she gave me. With all her responsibilities, we are falling apart.
The lesson was to discover how painful it is to know that you're not in the priority list.
She then told me: "Now alam mo na naramdaman ni G." to which I replied: "oo.. sakit pala.. to think I live with my family pa. samantalang sya, she lives alone... ngayon ko naiintindihan yung naramdaman nya when she gets lonely and when she feels she's not my priority.."
It's true that nobody is perfect, but when we love a person.. we're willing to look beyond those flaws.. but then we can only take so much.
let me be the one to break it up, so you won't have to make excuses... we don't need to find a set up where someone wins and someone losses. We just have to say our love was true but has become a lie... so let me tell you i love you one last time and goodbye..
Labels: just venting out, love, moments, relationships
posted by jaded fool @ 7:02 PM
<< Home