rants and ramblings

last day of April

it's the 30th of April. Hopefully, i had my last day of bleeding yesterday. I am worried about what happened and I do not want to see the doctor to talk about it. I do not know if I still take up OC.. (not after what I have been through!) but hopefully, i'd get back on it after I see my OB.

I am at work now and tomorrow is a holiday. My brain is sleepy but my body is wide awake. Life is stable.. no new experience to write about.. I am thinking of getting a house but I am worried that my finances would come astray. Konting tiis pa siguro. Thinking of investing too. Not that much pero it's a start. Hopefully, when I am old and grey these investments will work for me and the people I love.

Labels: dreams, God is good, health, life, self-love, winner, work related angst

posted by jaded fool @ 8:20 AM

Anniversary

Im celebrating my Nth year anniversary with Blogger.

For many years, this journal have accompanied me through triumphs and battles lost. Many posts pertain to heartaches and love lost... To pain and troubles... As we turn another year, i hope that we would write about new adventures of family life.. A life of being a wife and hopefully being a mother. To new adventures and travels.. A life of learning with someone i know who will take care of our family. Here's a new set of paint to splash our lives with. :)

And though i am scared of the unknown.. I know life will always be better with you simply because you love me.

My dear journal, i cant thank you enough for those times you stood by me and kept me sane. Here's to years of stories. Kampai!

Ps: its fiesta ng quiapo. Viva senor!

Labels: relationships, winner

posted by jaded fool @ 9:15 PM

when you move on

there were a lot times when I thought I finally moved on from G.. yet there would still be times when I would call on her to join a family thing. but something happened lately that i think i can tell myself that I am finally over her. I hope she's doing well.. but that's all i can say. I hope she's happy. I don't regret being with her cause I learned a lot as a person. And once in our lives, we were each other's everything. so ok na yun. I guess what pushed me to finally say I moved on is the fact that she has forgotten everything about us. so it was my que to forget everything as well. I should just let her be and be happy with the person I am with now. :)

I still have to know her deeper but as for now, I am satisfied that someone loves me.. and though we are apart, she's taking care of me. :) finally, I am free from the G. thank you Lord.

Labels: relationships, winner

posted by jaded fool @ 11:46 AM

Last working day of november

It's November 29. Last work day for November. Keep the moolah coming.

Labels: God is good, winner

posted by jaded fool @ 8:02 PM

IOS7

Apple's new operating system rocks! It's colorful, refreshing and alive!

Labels: winner

posted by jaded fool @ 3:17 AM

Be still and know I am God

Tonight i prayed to God to guide me through this life. Seems like forever since I've spoken to God this way. I asked him to make me strong. I know He is protecting me from harm yet I insist to have it my own way. I am surrendering to His will. He is the only one who truly have my back and loved me unconditionally. I am thankful that he loves me kahit ganito ako.

I thank you lord for your love and protection. Know what my heart wants and guide me to do as you will.

I know i will be better, God had always been faithful to me.

Labels: God is good, my thoughts exactly, winner

posted by jaded fool @ 10:20 PM

Doing unhappy things

Life is what we make it. We choose where it would lead us. You can choose to be free...or you can choose the weight and size of your shackle. Sometimes we chose to be shackled down because the road to freedom gets lonely. The sadness that creeps in the dark when everybody has gone still can make you crazy. Blurring reality, making you things that you know would just hurt you.

Many times, i have refused to thread the path to freedom since my tolerance with loneliness is quite low. I hate to think that i'd rather be shackled in a shitty situation than to get over something that i do know is not worth fighting for.

I have to clear my path, Walk through it and endure the loneliness that will test me.

That's the only time I can truly be free. :)

Labels: my thoughts exactly, winner

posted by jaded fool @ 6:19 PM

At iba pa..

Gusto ko sumulat tungkol sa trabaho. Tungkol sa pamilya.. Tungkol sa bagong pag-ibig...pero inaantok na ako, kaya bukas nalang.

Labels: winner

posted by jaded fool @ 7:46 AM

find your best friend

I've always felt that the best marriages are between people who are best friends. Having that foundation is everything. The advice I give to others is that you should always look for your best friend, because things could flourish and lead to something you might have never expected. It may actually take you by surprise that what you've always looked for might be right in front of you.

-- quoted from yahoo.

aww...sweet. :)

Labels: dreams, God is good, life, love, moments, relationships, winner

posted by jaded fool @ 2:25 PM

etc. etc..

Kuya and his family will be migrating soon.. and i must admit that I would miss my niece and nephew the most. They could be a handful but they made Tatay and us very happy. We are afraid (Ate and I) that once the kids leave, Tatay would get bored and would be left with nothing to do. For one, Ate would not have her pamangkins to spoil and to bring to the mall.. I hope we get to join them soon. I need to work on it and It will take a lot.. but I just need to focus on that target, aim, and let go. :) On a brighter note, I had Bogart blessed yesterday then we (My Kuya and his family) attended the mass. I should go to church every weekend.. (im just saying, right?) I have to admit that the blessing made the difference. it's like the devil was shunned out. hehe. April 29 is just too soon.

Labels: family, God is good, love, my thoughts exactly, winner

posted by jaded fool @ 9:24 AM

36 and counting

Hello blogger.. I turned 36 last tuesday and i had a blast. I celebrated it my family, my co workers.. I love birthdays.. I love celebrating.. And i love life! I'm 36 and fabulous! :)

Labels: God is good, winner

posted by jaded fool @ 8:27 PM

you and i

always be...

Labels: my thoughts exactly, winner

posted by jaded fool @ 2:11 PM

baon

loots!

last week, i went to work having these in my bag. hehe. It's my first time to have cuervo.. and i discovered that I am allergic to it. sucks...so i didn't finish the whole bottle.. I brought home the remainder, stock in in the cabinet to await my return. hehe.

kampai! :)

Labels: God is good, life, moments, self-love, winner

posted by jaded fool @ 4:16 PM

my domesticated weekend

It's the first weekend of 2013 and spent it working on some document, tinkering my stuff, cooking and sleeping. I've always been a sucker for sleep so i make sure every weekend i have my 8 hrs ++ of sleep..siesta included. Saturday is my sleep day though i still wake up at around 6.30am to have breakfast with tatay..i spend my day in bed reading..sleeping. I always wash the dishes at night during weekends cauae ate is tired from work.. I also drop her off to work and i cook to give tatay a break. Sometimes i miss the inspiration to cook for someone. I would always pretend that ill be having a visitor so i van push my butt to crush some garlic or saute some onions. Tonight is one of those days.. And i decided to prepare some baby back ribs. It's my first time to prepare a marinade and it felt like i was conducting an orchestra. I am not even sure if what i was doing would be palatable. I crushed and rubbed like there's no tommorow.. With a roleplay in my head. It was fun.. Then it was lonely when its over. Just like that. I miss this simple joy of preparing food for someone special. I really do.

Labels: comedy, desires, family, just venting out, winner

posted by jaded fool @ 9:35 PM

way forward

Once 2013 starts, i'm brushing myself of my past and work on my future. setting my goals and achieving them one by one. if you dont hear from me, you are part of the change that im making. good riddance bad vibes!

Labels: just venting out, self-love, winner

posted by jaded fool @ 10:36 PM

2012: my year ender

It's that time of year again when I count the blessings that i recieved for the year.. I would say this year has been good to my career cause i finally grew up professionally and i value my job more.I travelled a lot both in my work and leisure. my family and i get to see Palawan. Relationship-wise.. still longing for my long lost love.. broke up finally with P.. And decided to move on from what G and I were having, whatever taht is. I met someone who adores me like crazy.. but i have to wait till 2013 to see how it'll go.

there were a lot of catastrophes that made my heart break. this year i lost both Lola's.

no matter what, i am still thankful that i get to live the year..met new friends.. and accomplished a lot. To you God, you have always been wonderful to me. thank you so much for always having my back. i love you.

Labels: family, God is good, just venting out, love, moments, prayer, self-love, travel, winner

posted by jaded fool @ 8:05 PM

surprise!

This arrived today. Colors that are sweet and affectionate.

“I am nothing special, of this I am sure. I am a common man with common thoughts and I've led a common life. There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten, but I've loved another with all my heart and soul, and to me, this has always been enough..” ― Nicholas Sparks, The Notebook

My co-workers went brouhaha over the flowers that arrived today. Delivered for ME from someone who loves ME, and cares for ME.. someone that is MINE alone. :) Cheers to a productive week! And you dear flower, will stay on my table, until its time for us to go home.

Labels: God is good, love, moments, relationships, self-love, winner

posted by jaded fool @ 3:11 PM

happy

Celebrated Ninang Gaying's Bday and Despedida Party. We heart you a lot Ninang!

Labels: family, love, photos, winner

posted by jaded fool @ 2:06 PM

transition and winners

I have just finished a 4-day training on Supervisory Development Course. I had so much fun learning! I am thankful that I was nominated by my boss. hehe. During the first day we were asked to identify 3 winners in our lives. These are the people who have made an impact or influenced you. Thinking very hard, I chose my Parents, Jane and other ~~close~~friends) and Romeo (my boss). Once you identified your winners, you have to identify what aspect of your life they influenced (family, work, social..etc..etc) and the qualities that you love about them.

Nanay and Tatay, of course being my parents-- they have influenced my most of my life. the qualities that i identified are: hard-working, patient, nurturing, mentor, loving, friend, provider and protector. For Jane and my other friends.. i identified that they understand me, and accepted me unconditionally, they are my mentor and protector as well. Romeo(and my previous bosses).. for their hard work, patience and ability to rise to the challenge.

After the training, my challenge is to inspire the people i work with and be a winner to others. To my winners, I cannot thank you enough.

Labels: family, God is good, moments, relationships, winner, work related angst

posted by jaded fool @ 9:18 PM

i did fight for it

i fought despite being hopeless. now is the time to move on.

Labels: family, God is good, love, winner

posted by jaded fool @ 5:50 PM